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2006-10-06 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: and rainedrop....y
2006-10-06 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: by the way....HELLO EVERYONE...III
2006-10-06 [RabidSphinx]: isay that because the person was stupid enough to trust their "partner"...th
how's this for respect? FUCK YOU!
2006-10-08 [L V F]: Well damn you know wat i still lurkaround here watching the wiki for something intresting. Rainedrop has a point. Ive had one or two bfs lie to me and i went with them and got them tested. didnt do anything with them after the results of course. Hell when i was with a bf i got tested twice a week atleast. had them tested zatleast 3 times a week
2006-10-08 [zoloftzantac]: you got tested twice a week?
2006-10-08 [~*Astarte*~]: I have a friend who was in the military - she and others were tested every 6 months - it was mandatory. "It can take up to 6 months from the time you become infected with HIV for the antibodies to be detected in your blood. This is commonly called the "window period," or seroconversion period. During the window period, you are contagious and can spread the virus to others. If you think you have been exposed to HIV but you test negative for it, you should be tested again within 6 months after your last suspected exposure to HIV." re HIV-1 Antibody Screen taken from http://ca.tstd
2006-10-08 [L V F]: that was 8 months ago and sence then i got tested twice
2006-10-08 [~*Astarte*~]: *doesn't understand* What makes a gal who choses to pleasure herself dirty? My Goddess, fetuses in utero touch themselves - it's a completely natural thing to do...
2006-10-08 [kittykittykitty]: Cattle don't have sex to make babies, they don't have enough brains to think that far ahead.
I beg to differ... >.> meh
2006-10-08 [kittykittykitty]: Hell when i was with a bf i got tested twice a week atleast. had them tested zatleast 3 times a week
Would that really be necessary? Unless either of you were sleeping around while you were in the relationship you would only need to be tested once (or twice, as stated in the point [~*Astarte*~] made, but then you would have had to wait up to six months to have sex) o_O
2006-10-08 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *shakes head at rainedrop* always the antagonist, huh?
2006-10-08 [~*Astarte*~]: My guess is that those who chose to repeatedly antagonize are usually very unhappy with some aspect of themselves and or their life...
2006-10-09 [L V F]: -coughs- we were in a poly relationship. i think a total of six partners at one point.
2006-10-10 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: good point [~*Astarte*~]...the bullies usually are mad at themselves in this world...which is why i stay "grounded" as rarely as possible. B')
2006-10-10 [~*Astarte*~]: I personally see nothing wrong with polyamorous relationships as long as the participants are all of consentual maturation (not sure if that sounds right) and that safe sex is mandatory.
2006-10-10 [RabidSphinx]: humans are like many breeds of bird, they are SUPPOSED to pair for life. to fight that and "choose" to sleep around is going against our very nature. i find EVERYTHING wrong with polyamorous relationships and the people in them. i can't wait till i grow up. i'm going to be a mass murderer.
2006-10-10 [L V F]: -chuckles- Rainedrop sence there arent many people who do aggree with poly relationships and know that believe i know it very well. Anyway poly relationships for me were actually the best relationships i ever had with a person. ud be surprized how much u start careing for the people involved.
2006-10-10 [~*Astarte*~]: Just because I see nothing wrong with a particular type of relationship, doesn't mean I would be in one myself. Those who know me in the "real" world, know I'm very accepting, non-judgmental and open to people living their lives in the ways that work for them. My feeling is that as long as no one is harmed, and love, trust and respect are abundantly present, if it works for them - so be it. Look at the statistical data of "normal" hetero relationships that don't survive... My gosh, if a couple can make their relationship work - filled with the things I've mentioned above - more power to them.
2006-10-10 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *bows to [~*Astarte*~]* so true...and nicely put too.
2006-10-11 [~*Astarte*~]: No need to bow, [Lyon Armonial the healer] - but thank you for the thought. :) Tis just my view on life, love and relationships.
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: it's a good view to have, and i wish that more would have that view instead of being so close minded. *glances at someone in particular*
2006-10-11 [~*Astarte*~]: Maybe look at it this way... Instead of thinking that someone is close minded, try opening yourself up to the notion that they have a different opinion/view of the same topic/issue than you do. It doesn't mean they are right and you or wrong or that you are right and they are wrong. It simply means that they have a different viewpoint.
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *nods* this may be true, but when they discriminate anything that does not conform to their beliefs while saying "treat others the way you would wish to be treated" is slightly hypocritical and annoying. judgment should n'er be clouded and never made upon a first impression. well, i am off to go meditate and then sleep. blessed be [~*Astarte*~] and have a good eve.
2006-10-11 [~*Astarte*~]: I totally hear what you're saying - I do. I guess you could say it's about practicing tolerance - listening to what others say and then letting whatever it is that no longer serves you just pass. Enjoy your meditation - blessed be.
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *smiles* you know...this is the first actually calm conversation this wiki has seen in some time! well, they must give respect to earn respect...i give everyone respect at first, and if they choose to disrespect me, then so be it. *laughs* wow...me and you seem to be the only two that have been talking in here for awhile!
2006-10-11 [RabidSphinx]: mass murder makes me happy
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *sings along* dead bodies make me happy...
2006-10-11 [RabidSphinx]: Say what you will of me, I'll always have juggalo family!
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *shakes head* it's been awhile since i heard that song
2006-10-11 [RabidSphinx]: my brother and his friend Kris (who lives with us) are hardcore ICP fans, so i hear the songs alot
2006-10-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: hell's pit and dark lotus are my fav.
2006-10-11 [RabidSphinx]: i like Mr. Happy
2006-10-12 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: i'm happy happy happiest
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: I'm kinda fat and I sweat alot
but that's the only bad kwinky things I got
That and maybe the whole murdering aspect
but we ain't even really got to that yet
I love people I love everything about them
and that's why I gotta live life without them
Huh? I know this don't make any sense to you but fuck you
this songs about me exclusively
Murder, Murderous, Murderation
The murdering mentality without an explanation
I'm Mr. Happy and I ride a bike (Ching)
I aint gotta seat I just sit on the pipe thing
I whistle, I sing I'll pet your poodle
I'll twist and squeeze your neck like a wet noodle
Cuz I'm so happy I'll stab your ass
and lay down next to you dead in the grass and sing
Oh, it feels so good everytime I murder I get happy
Happy, happy, happy
Its found happy, happy, happy
Its found happy, happy, happy
Its found happy, happy, happy
Murder, murder, murder you
I murder, murder, murder you
I murder, murder, murder you
I murder, murder, murder you
I love you so hand me your neck
let me teach you about love and respect
Respect the fact that I love to kill
wait a minute yall I gotta take my pill
(Zanoffs, it works, I'm down to only 3 people a day)
My victims, I give em love and care
I don't wanna get blood everywhere
I don't use a chainsaw or a butcher knife
that's so 90's, get it right
I never mutilate or chop my loves
all I really need is a pair of gloves
Or maybe a car I'll run em down with it
I know that can be messy but the birds will get it
Don't you see that I love you...idiots
I'm Mr. Happy and I'm all about fun
Now get in the pit and try to kill someone
Oh it feels so good everytime I murder I get happy
My bike has a basket full of strawberries
I picked them myself along with apples and cherries
and lemons and oranges and boogers and limes
plus theres a faygo in there but that's mine
red flowers like after your dead
I'll plant seeds and grow em out the side of your head
I got flowers all over the back yard
In the form of a Joker's card
Uh oh
Feels good I'm like the choko of my neighborhood
I'm one of those midnight creeps at Denny's
talking to myself and licking my pennies
I got a french fry hanging out of my beard
Don't go near that guy, he's weird
You know I'm all good and everythings all right
When you hear this scream in the middle of the night, like this
Oh, it feels so good everytime I murder I get happy
2006-10-12 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: rainbows and stuff
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: that is my song. :) i hope you all understand how much killing people really does make me happy. like a weight off my chest. not quite a rush like in the movies, a release.
2006-10-12 [L V F]: Dont get mad but this is my point of view. i think u need help raine. atleast if ur serious. Killing something is never a good act. Its never the right thing to do.
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: this coming from someone pictured with swords on his profile...
i accept your opinion as YOURS. i feel that killing people is a VERY good idea at times and i look forward to it. it's what gets me through my week. i think about it constantly, and write about it in great graphic detail.
i don't need help, i just need to loose those last few moral scruples and ethics i have. I have a few hangups still. I can feel pity now and then. I hope to be cured of that soon.
*points up at the song* like i said, i love that song
2006-10-12 [~*Astarte*~]: [RabidSphinx] said, "i hope you all understand how much killing people really does make me happy. like a weight off my chest. not quite a rush like in the movies, a release." You've actually experienced killing people?
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: i would never be dumb enough to admit to such a thing online. :) yes or no, you shouldn't ask questions to things you don't want to know the answers to
2006-10-12 [~*Astarte*~]: Your statement implies that you have killed and enjoy killing people. I don't ask questions unless I care to hear the answer. If someone makes a statement such as the one you made above, I expect the statement to contain the truth.
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: implies, maybe...but says nothing. plausible deniability.
how about i say. "no one is missed" how about that?
2006-10-12 [~*Astarte*~]: You can phrase your statements as you see fit.
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: fit....hahaha.
2006-10-12 [L V F]: [~*Astarte*~] i finnaly understand what changed her. -shakes head- oh well. And raine i collect swords i dont use them on people. Not to saay i havent been in a fight and used my knife to maime somebody who was trying to kill me. But that is self defense cold hearted murder has no reasoning behind it. U will get caught and u will goto prizon for 20+ years. Or you might get the death penalty. eathier way your gonna have one shitty life
2006-10-12 [catelf]: Since I don't likve near a ghetto, would you care to explain the difference for me?
2006-10-12 [HowlofDoom]: interesting...
2006-10-12 [RabidSphinx]: caught? not if someone else is already pinned for it.
(SOMEHOW MY CAPSLOCK IS NOW STUCK ON>>>SO I"M NOT YELLING< IT JUST WONT GO AWAY>>>FUCKING KEYBOARD)
BLACK PEOPLE ARE JUST PEOPLE> CAN BE NICE< CAN BE MEAN< WHATEVER> NIGGERS ARE THE ASSHOLES THAT ARE "AGAINST WHITEY" AND THINK THEY DESERVE SPECIAL RECOGNITION FOR BEING BLACK< WEAR BLING AND OTHER EXPENCIVE APPARIL WHEN THEY ARE ON WELFAIR>>>THOSE ARE NIGGERS THEY HAVE THE ATTITUDE AND SHIT
2006-10-12 [HowlofDoom]: I don't think race only has to do with some people because of the way the rest of the world views them so in turn they become that way because that's what has been put into their heads... other than that the way a person is has nothing to do with race... some people are mean and some are nice no matter what race...
2006-10-15 [zoloftzantac]: This isn't a place to have an edgy rant on when racism is okay. I don't want to see racial slurs of any type in use in this safe zone. I'm sure we can all find ways to communicate with out racial slurs.
2006-10-15 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: you know what....i live in detroit, and you all know how bad of a rep it has...yet when people come to detriot (ex. baseball games) they see a nice city.
2006-10-16 [~*Astarte*~]: I wasn't aware that Detroit had a bad rep... Why is that, [Lyon Armonial the healer]?
Thank you, [zoloftzantac], for addressing the racial slur issue. I haven't heard that word in years - but my goodness, when I do, it makes me cringe.
2006-10-16 [RabidSphinx]: i like that word. some people are niggers...it's not a race thing, it's an attitude thing. ever hear "wigger"? same attitude, nearly the same word.
2006-10-16 [zoloftzantac]: I can tell that you like the word ... the word is very loaded and any tolerated use of it here will make many people besides myself very uncomfortable. Use of such a loaded racial slur is not in keeping with the idea of a Safe Zone and I would appreciate if you didn't use hate words in that context here.
I am open to having a discussion about the word "nigger" but I am not open to usage like "some people are niggers". It is a loaded hate word with over 200 years of oppresion and bigotry tied to it. Your personal attitude can not erase that from the ears, minds and hearts of other people when they hear it.
2006-10-16 [~*Astarte*~]: Very well-spoken, thank you [zoloftzantac]...
2006-10-16 [L V F]: Detroit has alot of crime from what my uncle has told me. he lived in one of the older parts of town and he wasnt in that nice of a neighborhood
2006-10-16 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: yes, in some parts there is a lot of crime, but i do not feel unsafe walking down the streets of detroit at night.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: I don't know the city, but my guess is that may say far more about you then it says about Detroit. I have rarely felt unsafe walking around the Mission District in San Francisco or Downtown Oakland at night, but some people think I am crazy to do it. ;)
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: I think whether one is a male or female makes a difference... I also believe one's life experiences makes a difference. Unfortunately, a woman walking alone at night whether in a nice neighborhood or not, is far more a target for unkind acts than a man walking alone.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: Seems pretty fucking lame. Is it really true though? As a man walking at night I've been beaten on the side of the road a few times, had glass bottels thrown at me from moving car windows, two handguns in my face and I've been yelled at and threatened dozens of times ... now that I think about it, maybe I'm not very bright for not being worried :\
Luckily I've never been mugged or raped though. I guess I don't look like someone likely to have what most muggers and rapists want ...
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: I could be way off base here, but I believe if one looked at the statistical data for night crimes (male victims vs. female) my sense is that the crimes committed against women would be greater in numbers than those committed against men. Maybe my statements stem from my own intense fears about walking alone at night...
2006-10-17 [L V F]: No ur right wiccan. More men do crimes against women than women against men.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: uhh, I'm sure that is true. I think the question is about the gender of the victom though, not the gender of the attacker. ;)
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: As I said, my statements probably stem from my own intense fears about walking alone at night - I haven't researched the statistics to back up my statements.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: It is differant, I think we are talking about rape for women and assult for men.
and even then I'm sure the statistics are skewed because if one woman gets raped in an area the gals talk about it and they are all more careful around there. So I would expect that you wouldn't see a lot of repeated cases like that becuase women would change their behavior very quickly.
Guys on the other hand might get into fights every other weekend and still keep going out, many of them even looking for trouble.
I'm not saying being raped is like being beaten up, I'm saying I don't see a real way to compare the things. If you are worried get yourself a mini-stun gun or pepper spray. I bet you never end up needing to use it, but you may feel more safe to jog at night or whatever.
2006-10-17 [Bookwyrm]: From personal experience...i
2006-10-17 [Bookwyrm]: Er...and might I add that I'm not a violent person. ^^' Probably should've said that before.
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: black people call themselves niggers, and girls like me "crackers" so what? i know it is not seen possible for blacks to be racist, but what's the big deal? it's a word.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: The big deal is that you use the word with disrespect towards a whole group of people whom you don't know. It is a hate word.
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: i know them. i don't call just anyone a nigger, just the ones that have proven themselves to be. it's like calling them a "fucking asshole" same differance to me
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: I understand that. I'm not trying to tell you what to do. I'm asking you to please not use that word in this safe zone.
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: sure, fine then. it wasn't thrown out to insult anyone, or people, it was a statement of what i feel the word is. like a topic to be discussed. but since i don't care what anyone here really has to say, i can let it drop.
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: If you truly didn't care about what anyone here has to say, then why do you stay and participate?
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: honestly? i have no idea...you would think, since i don't care what anyone here has to say, or even like anyone here all that much, i would just leave. but i don't. i think it's because i feel the need to defend the point of views you all attack.
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: Have I ever *attacked* your points of view?
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: The only policy of attack this wiki has is to stand up against hate. I belive you that "it wasn't thrown out to insult anyone" I'd just rather play it very safe by going out of our way to try to not use language that a newbie might see as hateful.
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: aren't you extremely narcissistic that you automatically assume i am referring to YOU in my comment. i said "you all" as a generalization so as not to accuse anyone of anything. i do not know/remember if YOU have, but then again, i do not feel the need to encourage you narcissism by answering your question.
2006-10-17 [~*Astarte*~]: Since I participate in this wiki, I am a part of the "you all" you referenced above. I know you were not singling me out personally, and didn't take it that way. I merely wanted to keep it clear that I've not attacked your points of view or your defense of them. My sense is many here haven't attacked your points of view - challenged maybe, but attacked? That's a fairly strong word to use.
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: i think you have a rather biased view of your OWN actions.
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: We all have some bias, but I don't see people attacking you on this wiki ...
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: uh-huh.....
http://flashan
that made me giggle.
made me want to have a smaller waist and more prodominent ribs too though.. >_<;
2006-10-17 [zoloftzantac]: jealous of a drawing? you would really rather look more like that?
2006-10-17 [RabidSphinx]: well, i don't want to look like a drawing...lol.
2006-10-19 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *gags* i think that is a bit too thin....
2006-10-19 [RabidSphinx]: a bit to thin is better than a bit too heavy
2006-10-19 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *shrugs* it depends on whom you ask...either way, it could spell disaster.
2006-10-19 [RabidSphinx]: D-I-S-A-S-T-E-
2006-10-19 [zoloftzantac]: heh, disaster is RD's middle name :p
2006-10-19 [L V F]: -yawns-
2006-10-19 [BlindGuardian]: maybe some people just needs to feel attacked, thus becoming the center of attention, and that's why they stay...
2006-10-19 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *shrugs* everyone has their own reasons for being here i suppose...
2006-10-20 [zoloftzantac]: Good to see you are still around Mom ;)
2006-10-20 [RabidSphinx]: oh yes. i do love feeling the victim. :) and my middle name is Jean, Zoloft, you silly head. :)
2006-11-15 [RabidSphinx]: omg, this place is boring! if people are not fighting NOTHING happens! must i create a scene just to call you all from your graves? >_<
who here has penis envy? *raises hand*
2006-11-15 [zoloftzantac]: you can have some of mine :p
2006-11-15 [RabidSphinx]: ahhh! XD that was not what i meant! *dies*
lol.
you are too much of a hippy for me zoloft. i need vampire-goth-e
2006-11-15 [zoloftzantac]: hippy? that's funny, not at all, though I do dig hippie chicks
I'd work on pasty for you though, I'd even shave all my body hair ;)
2006-11-15 [L V F]: -shakes head- yea wat are you guys smokeing and are you going to share?
2006-11-15 [RabidSphinx]: waxing works too. :P
2006-11-15 [zoloftzantac]: for you, sweet thing, I'd do it ;)
2006-11-15 [RabidSphinx]: hahaha! this sweet thing is a RaineStrom. i'm a force of nature. hahaha!
2006-11-15 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *rolls eyes* at least you all aren't fighting
2006-11-16 [zoloftzantac]: Sarah and I rarely fight, we just disagree constantly ;)
2006-11-16 [L V F]: lol zolo if that isnt the truth.
2006-11-16 [RabidSphinx]: Raine is a storm to be reckoned with, but Zoloft doesn't seem to mind weathering it...
2006-11-17 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: i like playing out in the nasty weather...espe
2006-11-17 [RabidSphinx]: i love wind. wind storms around here are my favorite. my hair just whips around and i'm pushed around. it's great.
2006-11-18 [catelf]: It snowed here last night! That's veru unusual... I don't think we've ever had snow this early in the year, at least not in the past ten years or so. Yes, it's probably global warming and we're all going to die, but I'm dreaming of a white Christmas...
2006-11-18 [RabidSphinx]: really? wow, we get lots of snow here. October 12th we got a blizzard
2006-12-08 [~*Astarte*~]: ...and quiet here, too...
2006-12-08 [X2]: I love hate <3
2006-12-09 [zoloftzantac]: Hello [X2], I haven't seen you in a while, what's up with your jesus haters wiki?
2006-12-09 [RabidSphinx]: he hates jews. :)
2006-12-09 [zoloftzantac]: huh? Why hate Jewish people?
2006-12-09 [RabidSphinx]: because he's a nazi. :)
2006-12-09 [zoloftzantac]: and don't you seem just a little too happy about saying that ...
2006-12-09 [RabidSphinx]: not every day i get to call someone ELSE a nazi. ^_^
i may want to kill everyone in the world, but at least i'm non-discrimina
people who hate Christians, or Jews, or people for any reason similar, are just begging to be shot in the face. :)
2006-12-09 [~*Astarte*~]: *is confused*
2006-12-10 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: [~*Astarte*~], i believe they are talking about petty racism...defin
2006-12-11 [~*Astarte*~]: I understand what the topic is - I just don't understand the reasoning behind hatred, racism and wanting to kill...
2006-12-11 [RabidSphinx]: i understand wanting to kill, just not racism. :)
2006-12-11 [~*Astarte*~]: And a reason to kill would be?
2006-12-11 [RabidSphinx]: i hate people. :)
2006-12-11 [~*Astarte*~]: Deja vous - I think we've had this conversation before...
2006-12-11 [RabidSphinx]: yet you still asked. :)
2006-12-11 [~*Astarte*~]: My apologies - my error
2006-12-11 [RabidSphinx]: sure sure
2006-12-11 [zoloftzantac]: Killing people really isn't a very nice thing to talk about, especially in this safe zone :\ Let's instead talk about the difficulties we have had in trying to NOT hate people. :)
2006-12-11 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: well, i believe that to hate something is human...all humans hate something, whether they know it or not...but it is what they do about that hatred that truely matters...hope
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: i enjoy my hate. it makes me feel alive
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: That's just because that is the only emotion you allow yourself to feel. It is a very safe one, along with anger, but all feelings can make you feel alive, and some of them even feel nice. :\
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: no they do not. anger makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside and there is no risk. :)
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: Okay, warm and fuzzy, but not good. Love can actually feel good, you might try it sometime.
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: no, love is BAD, because it leaves you WAY open to get hurt. i rather stick with hate and anger, i get the same warm contentness and none of the pain and risk and hurt.
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: Good luck with that, it seems to be working really well so far ...
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: love worked REAL well for me so far. a few weeks into the "hate" thing and i am feeling better than ever. mood and grouchy yes, but not hurting. ^_^
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: *removes himself from the conversation before he also starts to get confused about what is real*
2006-12-12 [~*Astarte*~]: < -- is confused... Hate is safe?
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: yes it is. no one can hurt you when you are hateful, because being hateful leave you alone, and no one can hurt you when you are alone.
2006-12-12 [~*Astarte*~]: Possibly hate gives one a false sense of security in believing they are alone...
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: um, i'm pretty sure i AM alone, so i'm not sure of "false" that is, but i sure do feel secure
2006-12-12 [catelf]: Is [RabidSphinx] taking her view on life from 'I am a Rock' by Simon and Garfunkel these days?
2006-12-12 [L V F]: Ok im lost what the hell are you guys talking about?
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: It's a Simon and Garfunkel song: "I am a Rock"
A winter's day
In a deep and dark December
I am alone
Gazing from my window
To the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow
I am a rock
I am an island
I've built walls
A fortress deep and mighty
That none may penetrate
I have no need for friendship
Friendship causes pain
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
Don't talk of love
Well, I've heard the word before
It's sleeping in my memory
I won't disturb the slumber
Of feelings that have died
If I'd never loved,
I never would have cried
I have my books
And my poetry to protect me
I am shielded in my armor
Hiding in my room
Safe within my womb
I touch no-one and no-one touches me
I am a rock
I am an island
And the rock feels no pain
And an island never cries
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: oh, i like that. first time reading it and i feel it sums me up nicely.
excellent.
that is my life in a nutshell, or rather, a song.
i think it is a perfectly good outlook to have on life. it is the most realistic to say the least
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: The trouble is that rocks and islands don't get to experiance loving and feeling loved :\
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: love only brings pain.
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: Not true, true love never brings pain and it never hurts.
You are suffering now because you were attached to geting something back in return for the love you gave. You were trying to trade your love for his love, and it doesn't really work that way. :(
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: then how DOES it fucking work! i though each gave, each received! i thought it was a 50-50, meet in the middle, come half way, compromise, situation! i thought you did what you wanted in return!
you wanted them to be faithful, YOU were faithful,
you wanted them to call, so you made sure YOU called
you wanted to be surprised with cute declarations of love, so YOU did the same!
tell me, what exactly did i misunderstand here?
2006-12-12 [zoloftzantac]: All of sounds like it simply falls under the "treat people like you want to be treated" idea.
If you want a partner who does those things then find a partner who wants to do those things.
It doesn't make sense to start with a guy who doesn't do those things and then expect that he will someday if you do it long enough :\
2006-12-12 [RabidSphinx]: thus why i fucking give up!
guys suck and women are bitches.
i wouldn't date a human if you paid me at this point because humans fucking suck and i hope they ALL die.
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: You're depressed, and you were depressed before your break up. Get help sweetie.
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: no
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: Great, then keep being miserable, with a numb heart and nothing but your hate to remind you that you are alive. Sounds peachy.
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: sounds better than being "better" where i'm naked to the world and open to be hurt time and time again and be alone and miserable at the same time.
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: You love didn't hurt you, and the love you recieved didn't hurt you either. What hurt you was your attachment to expectations that wernt met. If you can learn to love everyone then you won't resent them when they don't love you back the way you wanted. Then when you do find someone who also loves you, you will be able to share love, which is very differant that trying to trade love back and forth.
That would be like two beggers trying to beg from each other, desperatly wanting what the other doesn't have to give. You need to start out with love in your heart.
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: then fuck love. i tried that for 18 years and it got me nothing but bullied, teased, rejected, and made fun of. all that time when i was so open, so ready to love, so willing to extend kindness to everyone and anyone that needed it, i was sympathetic and caring, and kind and giving. everything God wanted me to be! i was taken advantage of, abused, and was alone in the end anyways!
and i'll tell you, that hurts WORSE!
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: I know some people are mean, and it is a shame that so many of them have been mean to you, but that's not a good reason to become mean yourself. You know? *hugs*
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: no, i think it is a perfectly good reason to be mean. it keeps the meanies away, and it makes me feel better.
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: but it also keeps everyone else away ... it hurts my feelings when you are mean to me
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: i could say i'm sorry, but i wouldn't mean it, and you know that.
you hated me when you first met me, i can't imagine why that changed, or why it hasn't gone back to that way if i treat you bad.
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: I'm not asking you for an apology (and I know I am not the only one who's feeling you have hurt) I would be a little suprized if you really didn't care at all.
I never hated you. I found your house and your art before I found your other wikis, I thought you were interesting and pretty and that is why I found your other wikis, because I was interested in meeting you and talking with you.
I wanted to talk with you about hate, and that is the reason I created this wiki, so you and I would have a place to talk. (since I was banned from your wiki at the time)
2006-12-13 [RabidSphinx]: well, you hate hate, i like hate. it makes me feel better, and in this world, it's everybody for themselves because no one ELSE will give a shit ot rry and make you feel better. all this world does it take and take and take until you are used up...they you are worthless and are kicked aside like trash
2006-12-13 [X2]: isent it better to love love then to hate hate? i think so... i love love.... and... i love hate.... aaaaah, nevermind.
2006-12-13 [zoloftzantac]: i love love & i hate hate, then I guess some people hate love, but I think only RD loves hate :\
2006-12-13 [X2]: why hate something... tahts so negativ.. really...
2006-12-13 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *laughs* zo, you have a point on that last comment of yours ^^
listen sweetie, just because you were hurt before doe not mean that you WILL be hurt again....the thing is that you never give up. if you do, then the person who was meant to be with you and cherish you might just walk right on by...the barriers we put up to keep out pain, also keep out any true joys. you may not even realize it if that special someone were right under your nose...that is how mysterious love is.
2006-12-13 [X2]: eh...... that wasent meant to me? aigt?
2006-12-13 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: that was to [RabidSphinx]...
2006-12-14 [RabidSphinx]: i don't think Brad Pitt will go walking by one day and i'll miss him. thanks for your concern, but it aint gunna happen and i'm not about to go get hurt just so i can say i "tried" in the end when i'm alone. i would rather hold on to my delusion that someone MAYBE would have wanted me when i end up alone for lack of trying, than end up alone and KNOW no one wants me after having tried and failed.
2006-12-14 [zoloftzantac]: I want you <3
2006-12-14 [RabidSphinx]: yeah, well, you love fags, and i don't, so it wouldn't work...get over it. i'm a stupid bitch. realize it already.
2006-12-14 [~*Astarte*~]: I'm touched by the community spirit that is responding to you [.BrOk3n.]... As for Brad Pitt, my guess is Jennifer would call him an ass and recommend you let him keep on walking...
2006-12-14 [zoloftzantac]: Oh, I know you're a stupid bitch, but I love you anyway
( even more than I love gay strangers :p )
2006-12-14 [RabidSphinx]: jennifer is an ugly-ass worthless bitch that didn't deserve him and wouldn't give him kids. i just know i cannot compete with perfection (aka, Angelina)
2006-12-14 [RabidSphinx]: but you fight for fags to pervert marriage. it disgusts me. physically, to know that.
2006-12-14 [~*Astarte*~]: I think Jennifer is beautiful...
2006-12-14 [RabidSphinx]: i think she is ugly...but regardless, she was a bad wife.
*hugs brad pitt*
2006-12-14 [zoloftzantac]: I don't give a fuck about marriage, you can have it for all I care. Gay couples are being denied many of the rights that straight couples have, that is gender discrimination
What makes me feel ill is how even with a little bit of progress, America has learned nothing from these lessons.
2006-12-14 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: humanity go in circles zo, you know that!!!
2006-12-14 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: well [br0k3n_t0y], are you completely sure that you even know what love REALLY means yet? it is surprising how many peole say they do, yet fail to see the full richness and value of it....it is something that can not truely be discribed in words, for not words are good enough for it. your love for brad pitt is just idolization...
2006-12-15 [RabidSphinx]: if fags don't like it, they can leave my country. gay is legal in the UK, let them die of AIDS over there. good riddance to bad rubbish.
2006-12-15 [RabidSphinx]: oh, and fuck you [Lyon Armonial the healer]
...learn to spell my username right...
you don't know shit about me, how i feel, or what love is yourself, so you can take your philosophical psycho-bable bullshit and shove it up your ass.
2006-12-15 [zoloftzantac]: Okay, this conversation is getting out of control for this wiki. In this safe zone it isn't okay to be so rude to someone else or to talk about hating a specific group of people and wanting them to die.
I realize you are angry RD, but please try to honor the safe zone as best as you can.
2006-12-15 [~*Astarte*~]: Well said, [Lyon Armonial the healer] re true love. Although, my experience has been that until one truly loves one's own self, one cannot truly be open to being loved by another.
2006-12-15 [zoloftzantac]: that and true love can not co-exist with hate :S
2006-12-15 [RabidSphinx]: like i said, Fuck love.
2006-12-15 [~*Astarte*~]: very true [zoloftzantac]
2006-12-15 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: *sits back and folds arms yet bows to [~*Astarte*~]* this is true...fine [RabidSphinx] i will keep my comments regarding you to my self. and true love is the complete willingness to give one's self up for another person even if they might have hurt you, so yeah, i do know.
2006-12-15 [Lyon Armonial the healer]: oh look....i SPELLED NAMES RIGHT!!!!!!
2006-12-15 [~*Astarte*~]: Hmm... My experiences have taught me that it's not necessarily a good thing to give one's self up for another. I have found that whenever I have given too much of myself to a relationship or another person, I'm left feeling resentful and hurt. I believe balance is the key. And truly beginning with a healthy relationship with one's self is the best place to start. Often times, I believe when we are found pointing our fingers at another we are in relationship with (lover, friend, co-worker, child, partner, etc.) we are better served by turning that finger around and pointing it at our own selves. A lesson I did not fully understand until I was in my late 30's is that when I'm having a challenge with another, I'm best served by taking a good look at my part in the relationship, rather than focusing on what the other might/might not be doing wrong. For really, the only person I can change is myself.
2006-12-15 [~*Astarte*~]: [Lyon Armonial the healer] thank you for the gesture. :)
2006-12-15 [~*Astarte*~]: I'd like to share my Virgo online horoscope for Tuesday, December 12, as it follows along the same lines with what I shared above... "When you criticize others, it means you're hyperaware of all the areas where you need to be more vigilant. Just remember that not everyone has the same desire for self-improveme
2006-12-15 [RabidSphinx]: my horoscope is "You crave a spontaneous, independent man who can keep pace with your wild lifestyle and bedroom moves (yeah, that's SO accurate...*ro
yeah, this is why i hate these things...i want to kick the person who is making them up in the face really hard.
2006-12-15 [zoloftzantac]: * is a spontaneous and independent man who can keep pace with wild lifestyles and bedroom moves, is outspoken, loves debate, has a kind heart, and does see something very good inside a certain gal* ;)
2006-12-15 [RabidSphinx]: me being a "tough girl" isn't an act, and i don't have a wild lifestule for ANYONE to keep up. i hate horoscopes. other than for the fact that it says i'm a stubborn goat, they never seem to be accurate. this is mine for Feb.
"In February, two sexy but very different guys ask you out for V-day." and then it goes on to say "You're such a man magnet that even if you're attached, you'll chat up any hottie who crosses your path. you get such a rush from reeling in guys"
i read that and nearly spat milk out my nose. if that were any MORE inaccurate it would have said i was a 35 year old mexican man going to ITT who likes croquette.
2006-12-16 [~*Astarte*~]: [zoloftzantac] says *is a spontaneous and independent man who can keep pace with wild lifestyles and bedroom moves, is outspoken, loves debate, has a kind heart...* Um... I would agree with that...
2006-12-16 [zoloftzantac]: heh, RD isn't interested though :p
about horoscopes, they are mostly just for fun, a good astologer can make some good generizations about some things, trends, energies, etc
but any astrologer who tires to predict the future based only on ones birth month is full of crap. I mean, of cousre the same future can't be right for 1/12th of the population. :p
2006-12-16 [RabidSphinx]: not interested is one way to put it.
and all i do is ignore my horoscope because 1) i don't believe in astrology, and 2) they never are accurate.
if i were an 'man magnet", i don't think i would be in my current situation. and i wouldn't be a 20 year old virgin
2006-12-16 [RabidSphinx]: http://www.you
i love that song. Wierd Al is the best
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